For example, Westerners are repulsed by prostitution because it goes against the notion of independence, the female's right to choose her mate. Prostitutes are considered as outcasts in Western society because they are not independent. Also a westerner feels uncomfortable with the Thai notion of sharing your wealth with your family as it goes against his ideas about independence.
Western parents are also proud of their children if they are rude or abusive to authority figures such as teachers as it shows that they have been brought up right - they are showing independence! That section is enough to scare away any Thai lady I think - Truly Ting Tong in the Thai value system.) So the book does over-simplify things.
It is a system that reminds you of the old Roman social system. It works within a group of people who have a hierarchical idea about society. There are unwritten codes within a community that determine who is up and who is down among that group of people. If you have been given a favour through someones generosity it obliges you to try at every opportunity to honour this debt. It may be that the recipient of the generosity will never be able to honour this debt and will forever be a client (the Roman term) who has to show respect and gratitude towards his patron in whatever small way he can. If fortune shines on the person who has been given generous favours and he is able to repay these and more then the tables are turned and it is the other person who is now indebted and has to show respect and gratitude. Thais will know when these small balances of power have taken place - it is in the nature of their hierarchical way of thinking.
Westerners are alien to this system as we have adopted a capitalist way of thinking. 3-400 years ago most Westerners thought like Thai people, but with the advent of capitalism and a more dynamic and fluid social system Westerners came to think of everything as short business transactions.
Westerners like written contracts in their human relationships. In that way both parties are clear about how to fulfil the agreement they have made with each other.
Westerners live within a dynamic social system where there is constant change in who they do business with or interact with. They do not live in static small communities where debts are being repaid in drips over many years. Westerners need instant pay-offs - instant fairness - quid pro quo.
The point the book is trying to make is that Thai people expect the farang to be generous. In their eyes it is not something that is one way - ie. the Thais exploiting the Westerner's wealth. The Westerner should be happy to show Naam jai as people become indebted to him and according to Buddhist beliefs his present generosity will ensure that good things await him in the future (what goes around comes around).
If a westerner tries to resist this system and demands that everything should be totally fair here and now - ie. if he pays 1,000 THB for anything then he should see some kind of tangible pay back to feel comfortable - then Thai people will look upon him with contempt.
If the flow of money from the westerner is a continual drip in one direction then the westerner feels exploited - this is bad business - I am being conned. But Thais think that if it should happen that the Westerner falls on hard times then he will be repaid manifold - the Westerner will never have to fear poverty or loneliness as he has now made so many people indebted to him. But the point is that this point of returning the favours may never occur. The Thais see no problem with this as this is how their social system operates. The Westerner should feel happy that he has high status within their community because of his naam jai.
People of Esarn
by Pira Sudham
This is an excellent read.
Pira Sudham is a native of Isarn who by his own efforts acquired an education and emerged from the deepest poverty to being nominated for the Nobel Prize for Literature.
People of Isarn is a collection of short stories all reflecting on the different life expereinces of people who have grown up in the North-East region of Isarn.
A common theme of the book is how all the different characters become displaced from Isarn and how they struggle to re-establish a link with their native homeland.
Firstly, there is the story of the boy who was given into the service of a monk as part of his parents' "merit-making". This story centres around the young man's efforts to retrace his old tiny Isarn village whose name does not feature on any map. It is not until the boy grows into a young man that he is released from his servitude and can finally ask where in Isarn he originates from. The boy was displaced from his Isarn roots due to the poverty of his parents and the drought-ridden nature of Isarn.
At the end of the story the young man returns to his Isarn home and determines to stay despite all the obstacles against it - the poverty of the land and the ignorance of the people has made Isarn a more difficult alternative to choose as compared with Bangkok.
Another story revolves around the efforts of a Bangkok taxi driver to bring his Isarn fellows back to their homeland. He tries to "trick" various characters he meets in Bangkok to return to Isarn by offering cheap rides. On each occasion the taxi driver is disappointed as he discovers that his passengers have not been "tricked" into returning back home. Instead they tricked him by making him help them attain face in their old villages. Thei sole purpose was to return home looking like people who have made it - not to become burdens on their families.
Another aspect that distinguishes Pira Sudham's writing is the anger that is sensed in each of his stories.
His purpose in writing in the English language and in a social-realistic style is to raise awareness among a wider audience about the great injustices perpetrated against the Isarn peoples.
The fact that he writes in English and not his native Lao language clearly shows that he does not expect any positive change for Isarn to be brought about by its own people. He portrays them as a people who are resigned and placid about their own situation.
This is especially highlighted in a story about a hired gunman. This Isarn man had turned to this trade because he had become displaced from his native soil due to the corruption of politicians and the influence of rich land speculators. His sense of powerlessness led him to act out his frustration and anger by becoming a hired hand. Now he kills campaigners for the Isarn people on behalf of privilgeged interests. Nothing stresses the perceived helplessness of the Isarn people more than reaction of this hitman to his oppression. Instead of confronting the causes of his misfortune he becomes an instrument by which the oppression of Isarn is continued. In a way, Pira Sudham is also using this metaphor to condemn the Isarn people themselves for allowing themselves to be so subjugated.
Pira Sudham has also chosen not to write his stories in Thai as he obviously does not feel that the Thai nation at large has helped Isarn or ever will.
Pira Sudham does not just criticise political authority but also goes for other groups that he perceives as perpetrators of Isarn oppression.
The Thai-Chinese of Bangkok are subjects of particular scorn. In one of his stories the female Isarn narrator works for them in a Noodle shop and she refers to the Chinese in this way:
They hardly talked to me, except when they wanted me to do things. No, I didn't mind that at all, even if you could sense a barrier there, that they despised you and considered they were your masters. You knew that they were poor once, but diligence and thrift helped them to be where they are today (...) What am I but dirt from the swamp of a remote little village in Ubol. I should be thnakful for every morsel I get (...)
This self-deprecating narrative of course reflects the self-effacing natures of Isarn people as seen by Pira Sudham - an acceptance of injustice and its inevitability.
Pira Sudham even extends his criticism to the sacred monkhood. Some monks are described as careerists who only chose this "holy" path because it might gain them social advancement and if given the chance they will ise it to marry into High Society.
"People of Esarn" is a thoroughly good read for anyone interested in understanding the complexities of Isarn and Thai identities. It is a vastly superior work of fiction regarding Isarn life than much of the fictional literature on Isarn written by Farangs - who often make the region look like some alien place populated by people unpredictable in their natures.

Blending In, Farang reflections on living in Thai culture
by various authors, edited by Gray Rogers.
When picking up this book at the booksellers it takes a bit of time to discern its contents. The cover illustration is slightly deceptive as it mainly features the holiday photos of various young backpackers which initially made me think that this was a variant of some Lonely Planet travel-book.
But it is not. The cover may feature young (often female) backpackers enjoying Thailand, but the written content is mainly written by older Farang males who have considerable experience of residing within Thai culture. Whether the deceptive cover was meant to invite a wider readership or just to try and dispel any prejudices about Farang expats only the editor knows.
The book is a collection of essays written by various authors mostly in an anecdotal style.
The book does feature a few female Farang authors, such as the feminist academic living in Hua Hin but finding the sight of old men with young Thai women intolerable and the teenager who experienced being sick in a Thai hospital during a short spell as a US exchange student in Hua Hin.
But, except for these brief accounts, the rest of the book seems to be written from the perspective of the middle-aged male ex-pat, albeit the academic sort of ex-pat.
The two first essays concern themselves with the Thai language and the difficulties Farangs have in dealing with it. In one of these essays the author stressed that he was not trying to make another phrasebook, but to me these two essays never seemed to become any more interesting than reading phrasebooks. They had some ideas on the peculiarities of the Thai language, but if you do not happen to be a linguist they were otherwise pretty meandering and slightly boring.
The more anecdotal essays on how different Farangs experience Thai culture are, however, quite good reading, especially if you are traveling or living in Thailand. They reflect well on experiences that many Farangs have of integrating with Thai people.
The essays are satisfyingly varied in style and content.
There is the more presumptive and analytical sort of author, such as Ray Pearce who writes about The Sporting Thais. His hypothesis is that Thai culture inculcates too much of a Mai Pen Rai attitude into its people which explains why the country does not seem to have any great sporting successes or athletes – Thais simply do not care enough about winning.
The night I read this section I also attended a real Muay Thai boxing tournament in Chiang Mai. This event did nothing to back up Guy Pearce’s hypothesis. The Farang audience was horrified by the competitive nature of some Thai parents on behalf of their teenage offspring. These parents had no qualms about seeing blood pouring from the brow of their 15-year old son as long as his opponent got an even harder beating. When a young chap was declare the loser his father picked up a foldable chair and in a very “un-Thai” way slammed it down in front of one of the judges accompanied by some loud, rude remarks.
Guy Pearce claims that the day Thais begin to excel in sports will be the day we can spell the end of the famous Thai way. It will signify an embrace of aggressive competitiveness supposedly so alien to Thai culture.
So the parents of the Muay Thai boxers either disprove Guy Pearce’s ideas or they signify how Thailand is rapidly being westernized.
Most essays of the book, however, tell short stories based on the personal experiences of the authors. These were good to read not because of any explanations they chose to give, but just because it is nice to read that other Farangs usually go through the same things as yourself but may react in different ways.
There are stories about the difficulties Farangs have in building houses or “palaces” in the villages of their Thai spouses, about how a scholarly Farang academic was impressed by the work of a Thai Shaman and about the importance of fitting in with your Thai neighbourhood.
In a way many of these stories are similar to stories written by ex-pat Farangs or Farangs in Thai relationships found on various web-forums and –sites. The difference is that the writing is lengthier and often more thoughtful. It is also a pleasure to read other people’s experiences in an actual book format rather than on a computer screen.
I would recommend the book as a light read to any traveler or as a bedside book for the Farang living in Thailand or married to a Thai.

Thailights, bright spots in an American Fulbright year.
by William E. Wormsley
This is an anecdotal account of the year an American anthropologist spent at Silpakorn University in Bangkok.
The author is to be commended for his engaging writing style that makes the reader want to complete the 200 page book in just one session. The experiences of the author are told in a vivid and entertaining manner. The audience for the book is clearly not academic but rather anyone with an interest in Thailand.
As you read the book, however, you are struck by its oddness. This is an American Fulbright scholar who has been invited to spend one year teaching and doing research in Thailand. His teaching load was extremely light – consisting of only one course each semester. The rest of the time he could dedicate to research. As you read this book it gradually becomes clear that the academic chose to spend most of this time observing the pondlife of Khao San Road and Patpong. His “research” hours were from the early evening until late night. His research tools would invariably include a regular barstool and ice cold Singha beers.
The author only really reveals his main interest throughout his Fulbright year in the very last pages of his book. The main bulk of the book covers his impressions of Silpakorn University and travels he made throughout Thailand.
I found it funny that the author only spent about 10 pages writing about his area of research – namely the migrants from Isarn now living in Bangkok, ie. tuk-tuk drivers, street food vendors and bargirls. Since these 3 groups of people were the ones he spent a lot of his spare time with they became his research subjects. I guess it would not have been as easy getting in touch with all the Isarn factory workers or maids of Bangkok who probably outnumber the combined forces of the 3 groups Dr. Wormsley dedicated his time to. I guess it would have been less comfortable seeking out these groups and it would not have allowed him easy access to his “indispensable” tool – the ice cold Singha beer.
Being a night-crawler he would spend most of his time in bars – so he would mainly “research” the lives of bargirls, but as he ventured out of the many bars he may chat with food vendors and on his way home with the tuk-tuk driver.
I find it peculiar that despite his claim to have visited every naughty bar in Bangkok several times and knowing all the regulars he does not really divulge anything substantial about his research results. The 10 pages he writes on the subject could probably have been written by anyone who was a regular at these places. He spends a lot of time ranting against moral crusaders and ends up concluding that everything about Patpong is good.
If it was not for the fact that Wormsley’s writing style is so engaging and sympathetic you might almost be led to believe that this could be an account of the demise of an American academic.
Upon his arrival in Thailand he was greeted by his academic colleagues who went out of their way to accommodate him and fit him into their social calendar. When he departed Thailand it became a mad, drunken dash to the airport with strings of bargirls in tow and none of his academic friends to be seen.
The author mentions his wife in the USA at the beginning of the book and at the very end. During his time in Thailand he never refers to her. He never refers to any doubting arguments they might have had about his “academic” interests.
Furthermore, every single person Wormsley refers to in the book who became a personal friend and would introduce him to Thai life and take him on tours was a young Thai female. He did not seem to spend much time with anyone else.
So is this a bar crawler who tries to hide behind academic legitimacy? Or is he just a voyeur intrigued by Bangkok’s naughty reputation? Is he simply a detached academic who made some fascinating observations about Thai culture, with a special focus on the naughty subculture that the rest of the world has come to associate with Thailand?
I find it hard to conclude that Wormsley would not have been motivated by all the above reasons – some more and some less. The oddness of him describing his year of hedonism while hiding behind academic legitimacy is either him taking the mickey or he is simply trying to avoid jeopardising his academic career. Anyways, it does not detract from the fact that the book is well-written and a pleasure to read.